Monday, March 23, 2020

Upsides to the Apocalypse

I'm just gonna go ahead and say it.

This coronavirus thing sucks.

Up until yesterday, I'd been trucking along just fine. I went to work on a modified schedule. I ate lunches with my dog. I hung out with my friends. Everything was going great, aside from the looming anxiety that the whole world was on the brink of disaster.

Then my jobs went on lockdown and I realized that I am, for all intents and purposes, laid off. So now I'm home, and I'm staring at the walls, and it turns out I'm bored.

So here are my initial musings and self-comforting thoughts to try to get through the COVID-19 apocalypse.

1. My pants won't get dirty.

One of the great tragedies of my life is that the pants I like get dirty at work so I don't wear them during the rest of my life. That won't be a problem for the next couple of weeks, so everyday denim, here I come.

2. Nobody drinks soy milk.
That means that while all the other grocery store shelves are bare, there's still plenty of plain soy milk left for me.

3. Baking is socially responsible.
Okay, maybe not really, maybe not always, BUT, since there is no bread on the grocery store shelves, I have a green light to bake my own bread. I've made three loaves so far. They were delicious.

4. Computer games still exist.
I have a long-standing love of PC games, thanks to a childhood of Carmen Sandiego and the Learning Company. However, I never play computer games. Like, ever. Because work. But now, sans employment, I am free to rediscover the joys of 8-bit entertainment. Have you guys heard of this newfangled Stardew Valley game? It's pretty nifty.

5. My friends are awesome.
My household and my friends' household have both made pacts: if one of us gets the virus, we're all getting the virus. Now, I know, the CDC is screaming bloody murder at us right now, but they can suck it. We're all healthy. We're all trying not to infect people outside our circle. But the two of our group who still have to go to work both work in healthcare professions and are all but guaranteed to be exposed. So we're still hanging out, sharing meals, playing games, and supporting each other, because we can.

6. There is an outside.
It's springtime. Every day, something gets a little bit greener, the birds sing a little bit louder, and that damn squirrel gets a little bit fatter. I can watch all of that from my deck, without raising public risk.

7. The Internet is infinite.
Now, I'm going to try my best not to fall into the black hole that is the Interwebs, but it does offer an unlimited array of education and entertainment options. I can still download audiobooks from the library. I can still find new knitting patterns to knock out my stash. I can still drool over all the vegan recipes on Pinterest. It'll be okay.

8. I really do have stuff to do.
I still have a butt-ton of stuff to organize from my move. I have 20 years of family photos to sort. I have a sweater to finish. I have things to clean. I have plants to water. I could vacuum my car. There really is stuff for me to do. I just have to stop panicking about cabin fever and actually do some of it.

I hope you're all doing okay. I hope you and your families are healthy. I hope you have lots of snacks in your cupboards. Comment below, give me your survival tips, share your favorite recipes, or tell me what you're doing to entertain yourself in isolation.

Also, if you know how to catch a freaking fish in Stardew Valley, please send help.

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