Utz Lemonade Potato Chip Review

You know the old saying: When life gives you lemons, make potato chips.

 

Life sure has given me a lot of lemons lately, so imagine my surprise when I saw these Utz lemonade-flavored potato chips. Initially, I thought I must have misread the bag. But as I careened toward the cardboard chip stand, my vision was validated. These are indeed lemonade potato chips.

What a time to be alive.

These limited edition chips are made in partnership with Alex's Lemonade Stand, a non-profit that funds children's cancer research and provides support to families facing a kid's cancer fight. I was especially touched to discover that Alex's Lemonade Stand has specific programs to support siblings of patients. For every bag of lemonade chips sold, Utz will donate $0.09, with a target of $25,000. (That's 278,000 bags, btw.)

Before I opened the bag, I had some thoughts about these chips. First thought was "wtf? Beverage flavored snacks?" Second thought was "I like lemonade with salty things." Then the third thought came from the deep recesses of my brain. When I was just a wee foodie, I tried to make homemade potato chips. I decided against using Mrs Dash Garlic & Herb seasoning on them and opted instead for the only other flavored dust at my disposal: lime Kool-Aid powder.

You guys, they weren't actually that bad.

Don't get me wrong, they were fully terrible -- soggy, chewy, unsalted -- but I couldn't stop eating them. Sometimes a girl just needs a citric acid fix, yaknow?

Needless to say, I had mixed feelings about tasting these chips. I still have mixed feelings about these chips.

 

They are a perfectly passable potato chip -- thin, crispy, salty, potato-y. But then they get weird. Instead of the lemonade flavor leaning into a sour/tangy/pucker-worthy lemon, it leans sweet. But not sweet enough to stop being a salty snack.

It's kinda like if someone ate an amazing piece of lemon cake with a thick glaze, then handed you the leftover paper plate to eat your potato chips off of.

My conclusion: Do not put your money where your mouth is. If you want to support cancer research, donate $5 to St Jude. If you also want to eat weird potato chips, get some Kool-Aid packets and become a mad scientist. But unless your curiosity is otherwise insatiable, skip the chip this time around. 

Vegan Pizza & Beer in Winchester, VA

 Over the weekend, I had the opportunity to spend a night on the town in Winchester, Virginia, and y'all, we need to talk about Pizzoco.

Perfect golden crust.

 

Gooey vegan cheese.

 

An expertly seasoned, slightly sweet sauce that is made in-house every day.

 

Choose from toppings galore to create your own masterpiece, or easily veganize several of their signature pies.

 

It doesn't get better than Pizzoco.

 

On this visit, we opted for the Tomato Pie to embrace the stunning simplicity of an artisanal pizza. Vegan cheese goes down first, then the sauce spirals across the top. Garlic, olive oil, and oregano finish out the flavor.

We ate the whole damn thing in one sitting. No regrets.

On my next visit, I'm eager to try a veganized version of the "Winchester": sweet peppers, basil, and onion with classic red sauce and vegan cheese. 

Speaking of Winchester, Pizzoco is in the town's historic district. Taking a stroll through the neighborhood will treat you to a brick-laid walking mall lined with restaurants and local shops. At the end of the walking mall, you'll find George Washington's office from his pre-war surveyor days. Glamorous, it is not, but it puts history in perspective when you acknowledge the great accomplishments of the man in light of his meager surroundings.

Pizzoco gives nod to another local treasure on its very walls:

See the green turret rising over the hill on the left? It isn't a whimsical invention from an artist's imagination, but rather the city's historic Handley Library.

 

The green roof is iconic in Winchester today, but when the building was constructed over 100 years ago, it gleamed in bright copper. Over time, the copper aged and its patina became a stately landmark overlooking the town. It still functions as a public library today, and its history and charm are just as magical as to stories it holds.

In addition to our stroll through time, we were able to visit Winchester Brew Works, a woman-owned, family-friendly brewery in downtown Winchester.

This is possibly my favorite beer experience of all time.

We opted to share a flight. It's the height of summer here, so three of our choices were light and fruity: the #glamping Pink Lemonade Shandy, the juicy Northside Light Lime, and the gentle 2200 Mile NEIPA (inspired by the Appalachian Trail). 

 

Our fourth choice was the velvety, decadent Bourbon Barrel Bear Tracks. This is a reprise of their fan-favorite peanut butter porter. In this version, Bear Tracks has been aged in bourbon barrels, resulting in a rich brew with notes of cocoa and vanilla. My recommendation: Don't buy the full pour of this. Order a mini and savor each sip without overwhelming your palate.

All in all, Winchester isn't the most vegan-friendly place I've been, but if you know where to look, you can find some hidden gems. If you visit, I hope you'll share your finds with me!

Earth Based Cafe Restaurant Review

 Do you remember the veganniversary post where I teased this picture:

Of course you remember. Who could forget something so epic and delicious?

That burger, my dudes, is the glorious creation of Earth Based Cafe in Martinsburg, WV.

Now, as a native Virginian, I was under the impression that the only vegan food in West Virginia was beer. But whooo boy was I wrong.

As it turns out, all I had to do to satisfy my junk food vegan hopes and dreams was drive across the border.

Let me tell you the tale.

One night after work, we made the impromptu decision to have a date night. So we hopped in the car, drove 20 minutes north, picked up a ridiculous amount of takeout for only two people, and ate it on a blanket in the park, all romantic-like. (Well. Almost romantic-like. If you ignore the fact that we couldn't get into the park and ended up eating ten feet away from the car in a patch of grass between the parking lot and a ditch. And also if you ignore the fact that we almost got run over by this one kid on a bicycle about four times. If you just focus on the food and the blanket, it was very romantic-like.)

 

We ordered two entrees, two apps, and two sides.

For the appetizers, which were gargantuan enough to be entrees in their own right, we chose garlic knots and cheesy spinach dip.

 

The garlic knots? Heavily. The marinara sauce? Perfection. The spinach dip? Cheesy as all heck. The tortilla chips? Warm and crispy, as the gods intended them.

Then, my friends, there were the entrees.

Are you prepared for this? Because I was definitely not prepared for this.

I ordered a nacho burger.

Just in case you haven't had the pleasure of feasting on a grilled Beyond Burger topped with two kinds of cheese, jalapenos, onions, chipotle sauce, and tortilla chips, I'm here to assure you it is spectacular. I would eat this every day of my life and die happy.

My dinnermate ordered a Philly cheesesteak.

 

This cheesesteak was loaded. We're talking holy cow thick. Acres of seitan spilling out of a warm bun, dotted with zippy green peppers and swirled with ooey gooey cheese. Delectable.

The sides we tried were macaroni salad (classic) and sriracha baked beans (exotic). 

 

Both were lovely accompaniments to an outstanding meal.

But that burger, y'all. I need you to understand how much I love that burger.

This is happy dance food.

I cannot recommend Earth Grown Cafe enough. Go there, eat the food, bring me some on your way home. Rinse and repeat.

BRAND WARS: Vegan Mac & Cheese

Have you ever spent a Saturday afternoon wondering what to do with yourself?

The answer is make four boxes of mac and cheese.

For science.

I can say this with authority, because that's exactly what my brother and I did this past Saturday.

Which means....ladies and gentlemen!

It's time for another BRAND WARS!!!!

Vegan Food in Hagerstown, MD

Does Rice Paper Bacon Work?

You know those people who can describe food so pithily that their prose elegantly encapsulates the essence of the dish?

I can do that with rice paper bacon. Because as it turns out, you only need one word to describe the nuance of the recipe:

Brand Wars: Coke vs. Pepsi

It's the question that has plagued humanity since the 1800s. Today, at long last, we will have our answer.

 

Limited Edition Brownie Batter Oreos

The flavor people at Oreo have been very busy lately. They came out with Smoreos at the beginning of the summer, then there were the cotton candy ones for Fourth of July (I wasn't going near those, sorry), and now there are these:

Yep, Brownie Batter Oreos.

I was skeptical of these right away, because, really, how are these different from the chocolate-on-chocolate Oreos? Very different, as it turns out.

Limited Edition S'More Oreos

Yes, folks, that's right: I've been lured out of hiding by the latest limited edition Oreo. And these are not just any limited edition Oreos. These are Smoreos.

Indeed, I discovered these campfire-ready Smoreos hiding on a shelf full of peanut butter Oreos (which were never really my thing) and I knew in an instant that these Oreos were coming home with me, diet or no diet, and that I would delightedly devour the entire package in likely only one or two sittings.

Wild White Nacho Doritos....the sad albino of snack foods

Guys, I have sad news.

It turns out I'm a little bit racist.

Yeah, I know. I'm ashamed of me too.

It's just that....well....

I tried the albino Doritos.

Limited Edition Red Velvet Oreos

Dearest Inhabitants of the Internet,

It is my great pleasure to inform you that, at long last, the planets have aligned, world peace has been achieved, and all is right in the Universe.

We have these to thank:

These are not just any ordinary Oreo--oh, no! These are the Oreo of all Oreos, the mothership of Nabisco delicacies. These are Red Velvet Oreos.

Lay's Chocolate Covered Potato Chips Review

For Christmas, Lay's released a limited edition collection of gourmet-styled chocolate covered potato chips. They come in a super-fancy impenetrable plasticy/foily bag with the words "delicious" and "luscious" written in expensive-looking letters.

I got a little too excited about these, but come on, they are chocolate covered potato chips. How awesome are chocolate covered potato chips? Very awesome. These are the things fat pimply girls' dreams are made of.

Little Caesar's Pretzel Crust Pizza Review

When I was a kid, we had a Little Caesars pizza joint in my hometown. They closed up shop sometime during the nineties and I didn't think about them again until a couple of years ago when another one sprung up on the other side of town. That in no way gave me incentive to eat there, as my town also has access to Dominos, Papa Johns, Pizza Hut, and DiGiornos, all of which are preferable to whatever microwaved food-like substance Little Caesars is churning out these days.

That was until I heard about the pretzel crust pizza.

This sucker has a salted pretzel crust, cheese sauce, cheese, and then more cheese.

Caramel Apple Oreos Review

The evil leprechauns are at it again! But this time, they've been joined by mischievous miniature teddy bears to bring us this appetizing swirl of brown and green Oreo creme. See for yourself:

Luckily, the mischievous teddy bears kept the evil leprechauns in line, because these Oreos are much, much better than the last batch of green Oreos we tried.

Caramel Apple Sugar Babies: The Most Confusing Candy on Earth

Caramel Apple Sugar Babies have a lot going on. At first glance, the box appears to be advertizing radioactive mouse turds. Or possibly poorly-illustrated olives.

Apple Cider Doughnuts (no, I'm not sharing)

Guys, these are apple cider doughnuts.

They are amazing. They make the world spin. They might even be better than pumpkin faces.

No, I'm just kidding, nothing is better than pumpkin faces.

But these are pretty close.

Brach's Crazy Candy Corn Review

Remember last year when we decided that things that taste like candy corn are very bad? This is totally different. This is candy corn that tastes like things. Completely new concept.

This year Brach's has unveiled four different kinds of crazy candy corn: Pumpkin Spice (of course), Caramel, S'mores, and Caramel Macchiato. All of these flavors proclaim they are "made with real honey," which seems a little weird to me since I don't know many people who make a habit of squirting honey into their pumpkin spice lattes. But hey, what do I know?

A lot. I know a lot.

Ben & Jerry's Pumpkin Cheesecake Ice Cream

I do not EVER want to be the guy who bashes Ben & Jerry's. I'm pretty sure that guy gets wiped out by the Golden Lightning Bolt of Doom, and I do not have a death wish. That being said, when I saw pumpkin cheesecake ice cream at the grocery store, my first thought was "ewwww." My second thought was, "I've gotta try that!"

I took the pint home, but I stared at it warily. Ben and Jerry are masterminds, sure, but pumpkin cheesecake ice cream? Really? It's ground-up gourd mixed into some sour cream and popped into the freezer. That can't possibly be good, especially when it's competing against wonders like Half Baked and Phish Food.

Pumpkin Faces!

Guys! Guys! It's fall! How do I know? Because of these:

Pumpkin Faces!

Eeeee!

Chips and Buttermilk and Why I Will Be Homeless

My roommate thinks I'm crazy. And yeah, okay, maybe sometimes that's a little bit true. Maybe. Sometimes. A little. But I am not nearly as crazy as he thinks I am. In fact, I think he's crazy because he doesn't completely love one of my favorite foods.

Now, you guys now I love sour cream. And what's better than sour cream? Well....cheese. But no, that's not what we're talking about today. We're talking about sour cream and onion potato chips.

And what makes sour cream and onion potato chips even more delicious?